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Birth plan illusion

I love the concept of birth plan. It allows you to imagine the perfect birth as you envision it. It helps weigh your options, ensures everybody is on the same page. There is no ambiguity. It feels like you are in control.

As with anything in life, control is an illusion.

The reality is you can never really plan for a birth. You can only wish for a certain type of birth.

Expectant parents spend a lot of time considering options, talking to concerned people, invest love and energy into making a plan. That’s very good and essential. It avoids last minute panic and uninformed decisions.

But when a plan is made, it is hard not to imagine the ideal scenario, visualize it and feel a deep sense of connection with the future and the baby. So much so, that when things don’t go according to the plan, moms begin to treat themselves as a failure! They feel guilty for taking pain relief if unplanned, or if c section is warranted.

Moms! Please ensure a certain detachment with the plan. Once made, accept that it can go any way. You have done everything you could and that’s that. During the delivery, tell yourself that how you bring up the child is important, not how you bring the child into the world. Surrender, accept. There is really no other option. It will make the delivery experience so much more pleasant, memorable.

In that sense, we need to rename birth plan to birth wish – for that’s what it really is.

Would you agree? Let’s talk about that!

Published by MotherWise

Respectful mother with a unique style of parenting. My mission is to simplify complex parenting issues. I focus on Pregnancy| Labor |Parenting |Mental Health and Well Being. Complications, Management, Support

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